Mel Gibson Helms Mostly Unwatchable Videos to Equally Unlistenable Girlfriend’s Songs

· Oksana Grigorieva, the Slavic succubus currently carrying Mel Gibson’s love accident, has granted CNN her first interview. Surprisingly, she used the opportunity to plug her album, Beautiful Heartache, for which Mel directed four videos. “They’re like dramatic miniature films,” she said, “A whirlpool of different, exciting, bright images.” I would have gone with “honey-drenched nightmare portraits in clown-faced close-ups,” but the whirlpool thing applies too, I guess.

· The most interesting sentence from this Newsweek first-person meditation entitled What If G.I. Joe Were Gay? comes buried in the end, and has nothing to do with Joe’s sexual predilections: “Before I fled, I wanted to check in on an elderly woman who had come to see the movie alone. She looked shellshocked in the lobby, but it turned out that she was only crying tears of joy. Apparently, she couldn’t wait for the sequel.” Something for Stephen Sommers to add to his Empowerment Scrapbook!

· Before Ryan Kwanten got his big break on True Blood, he used to get by catering to a highly specialized clientele of white-doves-with-protuberant-packages fetishists.

· Corrugated Foreheads, Extra Heads: io9 has the Top 10 Silliest Alien Prosthetics.

· Jennifer Hudson had a baby — a son! This calls for an “And I Am Telling You I’m Not Going” joke: “And I Am Telling You I’m Not Breastfeeding!”