Project Runway
Project Runway Recap: Rosemary's Blondie
Last night’s Project Runway dared the home viewer to recall older episodes when the designers did things right. Didn’t ring a bell to me either. But as each contestant sewed a companion piece to one of their earlier creations, two new competitions broke out: Irina’s one-woman quest to mangle everyone’s feelings, and Althea’s strange, internal grudge match with paranormal forces.
We’ve come to the point in the competition where even the My Little Pony-haired designers transform into demonic assholes. Here is our first indication that something is off.
Althea: “I mean (snicker), if I had to pick my favorite designers (giggle, snort), I’d probably ditch the boys and go with me, Irina, Carol-Hannah and — teehee — Satan.” [Building burns down behind her.]
Something or other possessed Althea, because she became what we in the industry call a mean girl this episode, tearing apart defenseless designers like Gordana (Come on, Althea; Gordana has fumes for parents) but with none of the Victorian entitlement of Irina. This amateur bitchery will be reprimanded in time.
Down on the runway, Heidi addresses the remaining six designers, who are seated in silence with their backs towards the runway. It’s all very Symbionese Liberation.
“Don’t worry, I’m not assigning Seal to kick anyone’s ass,” Heidi coos, remembering that Malvin’s ass is still on backwards after Seal’s first foray into corporal punishment. “However, the embarrassment you will suffer after you see what I have with me will also mess up your face. Turn around!”
The designers turn towards Heidi to see that she has six dress forms with her — each one exhibiting a remaining contestant’s work from a previous challenge. Mortifying, indeed.
Heidi: “Designers, these are the greatest looks you’ve produced this season. Telling, no? Irina and Althea have some cute shit up here. For you, Logan, we chose the dress that the janitors didn’t throw out. For you, Gordana, you had one dress that didn’t remind us of scary mid-’90s CNN reports. Christopher and Carol Hannah, you were only born two challenges ago, so we took what was available. Your challenge is to design a companion piece for your greatest look. Aren’t you guys lucky Leanne Marshall or Christian Siriano aren’t here? We’d just throw prize money at their designs as they walked the runway. Anyway. Make Tim give you a ride.”
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Posted 30 Oct 2009, 1:20 PM
at least nina shit on irina's dress a bit to bring a modicum of reality to 'judging'. this season is fucking awful.
Posted 30 Oct 2009, 2:11 PM
i will also like to commend NinaGarcia's comment that Irina's dress looked cheap. It was delicious. I only which the producers had opted for split screen with Irina's reaction as the blow was delivered. I can't wait until the season is over. Maybe next season we'll get desingers that aren't afraid to use color.
Posted 30 Oct 2009, 7:55 PM
HAHAHAHA After viewing the first 9 mins of this week's PR my TIVO stopped and I realized my devil-spawn, uh, teenage daughter, had cancelled the recording. Imagine my fit of pique and remorse. So after recovering, I came here to read Louis' recap because, well, that's what I do. Imagine my delight to find that I NEVER HAVE TO ACTUALLY WATCH THE SHOW AGAIN!! All those free minutes to spend following lame tweets on twitter and internet fangirling after celebrities, now that I know I can enjoy my weekly Project Runway fix by snuggling up with LV's prose, without actually suffering the indignity of watching the actual show. I think I owe my daughter a reward. Perhaps some makeup tips for her slutty Halloween costume, IDK?