WHAT'S ON
What's On: Dancing With the Flu
Dancing With the Stars’s resident pro Derek Hough was forced to drop out of last night’s competition when a “105-degree fever” swept him off his feet and into bed, where he phoned his escalating symptoms into his Mormon fan base via People magazine: “My whole bed was drenched because I sweated so much. I had to sleep in the bathtub.” Whether or not he’ll be back for Michael Jackson’s tribute performance tonight is still up in the air, but his fellow stars are taking precautions against Hough’s virus. Lacey Schwimmer is “living off Emergen-C,” Aaron Carter is “using hand sanitizer every five seconds,” while Mya suggests massages “to get rid of toxins.” Will the talents’ homeopathic preventatives keep them from joining Tom Delay on the losers bench?
Dancing with the Stars [9 PM, ABC]
It seems like only yesterday that Tom Bergeron was introducing DWTS Tacky/Tasteful interpretive tribute to Patrick Swayze. Tonight, the pros up the ante by celebrating Michael Jackson in front of a live audience of at least six Osmonds and a dozen contractually obligated ABC stars. Then, a dance team is cut based on last night’s paso doble and Argentine tango routines.
Melrose Place [9 PM, CW]
In the thirteen years since Melrose Place ended, Daphne Zuniga has led the life of television gypsy, traveling from guest arc to guest arc (R.I.P. American Dreams) until tonight when she returns as Jo Reynolds to the Ashlee Simpson-incarnation of her career-making series. Now a pushy photographer, Jo encourages Riley (Jessica Lucas) to bare her soul and a lot of skin during a beach side photo shoot. Meanwhile, Jonah (Michael Rady) meets a sexy film executive (Jenna Dewan) who is more interested in getting to know him intimately than business-wise.
The Good Wife [10 PM, CBS]
Double dose on Martha Plimpton tonight after The Goonies (below) with her special guest appearance as a ferocious, pregnant attorney fighting for a train company that was involved in a fatal crash. To ensure that the men’s widows receive their husbands’ pensions, Alicia (Julianna Margulies) has 72 hours to prove that the train company is to blame.
The Goonies [7:30 PM, ABC Family]
The 1980’s was a great time for Coming of Age tales, and this was probably the strangest. Like the World War II movies that put one of each ethnicity in a foxhole, writer Chris Columbus threw one member of every social group (fat kid, smart ass, cheerleader, smart Asian guy, deformed mutant giant) together and had them chase after a pirate treasure. In the 24 years since the release of the film our society has become way too ironic to allow a film this strange to be made again. That’s a good thing.
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Posted 20 Oct 2009, 3:59 PM
You typed "homeopathic" in your piece on Derek Hough but I am sure you meant HOMOEROTIC
Posted 20 Oct 2009, 5:04 PM
Gargling with salt water is the only way to stop the swine flu in the first day or two of infection. The producers know that, clearly, and are planning on turning dancing with the stars into grossout TV.
Posted 20 Oct 2009, 5:07 PM
What was up with the "Crazy Train" song?? Ozzy's daughter is dancing. Ozzy is in the audience. They kept referring to it as "Ozzy's Song".
And then some half-assed dude sings a karaoke cover of "Crazy Train"??
WTF????? I mean, really, WTF?????
Posted 20 Oct 2009, 9:05 PM
Don't talk shit about The Goonies. It's still all that and a bag of chunk.